Spiritual NLP Blog | Neuro-Linguistic Programming | Change Your Life | Gary de Rodriguez, Dallas, TX

When we use specificity we evoke emotions.  An example of vagueness is, ‘I’m going to change my relationship.’  Questions to ask are ‘from what into what’ – What is your outcome?  Where are you going?  State outcome, higher vision for the relationship.  I happen to be in an amazing relationship.  When I go off track and I’m giving the 411 on someone – whatever the really limiting thought would be, I am so beautifully asked, ‘what is your higher choice for that person?’  Is that your highest thought, Gary?  What is your highest thought?  Would it be great to have a relationship like that – where you’re supporting each other and keeping the focus to do good with the energy of your mind.  Would that be a good thing?

 

Create my dreams.  Into what?  Define your outcome and visions with specifics.  Make more money.  Your subconscious mind says, ‘Too vague, too vague.’  So you get to get specific.  I’ve been mind mapping a certain amount for a year and a half now.  I’ve yet to reach it.  I’m moving closer to it than I was before.  Mind mapping actually comes from Tony Bezanne who wrote the book on mind mapping.  Bob Stevens who I learned mind mapping from would say that mind maps he did 30 years ago, he’s getting results from now.  Plant the seed.  Have no attachment to when it’s going to sprout. 

 

Manifest my goals.  Define outcome by when and how.  

 

Heal my relationship.  Into what?  Define outcome and vision for the relationship.

 

How many of you have a higher purpose for your relationships?  Great.  When you write out a higher reason why you’re together, it creates a reference point for you to be able to really link from.

 

Heal my past.  Into what?  State outcome.  By when. 

 

Have the body I dream of.  What weight?  What size?  By when and how.

 

Our subconscious mind is programmed through our language, thought and emotion.  Repetition is the key to how our thoughts become manifest.  If we are habitually thinking and speaking in vague terms, deleting the specifics, we will habitually stay in process.  The reverse is true.  When we habitually focus on our outcomes with specificity we become masters of our destiny. 

 

In the language of distortion we’ve reduced vagueness by omitting personal and specific information.  By using distortion we speak non-personally, unrealistically, to avoid feelings.  Emotions are the key ingredient to having our word manifest.  Remember, our subconscious mind takes our language literally.  Examples of distortion: everyone and no one – who specifically.  Does what you are saying include or exclude all people on the planet who ever lived throughout time?  Everything and nothing.  What specifically?  Does what you are saying include or exclude all things that ever existed physically and non-physically throughout time?  Always and never.  When specifically.  Does what you are saying include or exclude all time from the beginning of time into infinity.  Everywhere and nowhere.  Where specifically?  Does what you are saying something that remains a constant forever?  Absolutely and perfectly.  Stops the possibility of having more.  Our subconscious mind requires specifics to produce emotions.  Emotions are required to imprint the subconscious mind.  Specifics in language produce emotion. 

Examples of vagueness – everyone really loves me.  The upgrade is on the following; they never did the best they could.  My mother, my father did the best they could.  I always feel this way in a relationship.  When I become intimate I feel vulnerable.  Everything is a mess.  My work station requires organization.  I can’t find a job anywhere.  I’ll continue to interview for my ideal career. 

 

Now, imagine if you walked around saying in your mind, ‘I can’t find a job anywhere.’  What are you going to manifest?  Have you ever seen a person who has been rejected over and over again for jobs and they walk in with their shoulders slumped and their head down.  Some of you have your own business and you hire and you know.  When a person walks in you know when they are present.  I absolutely believe in you.  I continue to believe in you.  I swam perfectly.  I continue to improve my stroke.

 

Speaking with specifics produces emotions.  Language spoken with emotion imprints our subconscious mind so our spoken word has the power to manifest.  When we use excessive generalizations in our language we disconnect from the people, places and things in our lives.  Excessive use of generalizations is one of the primary ways we stay disconnected from our feelings.  In the context of relationships, which occupy a great deal of our everyday lives, we tend to generalize excessively.  When we reference our relationships through vague language, some of which are pronouns, we stay disconnected and numb.  Our subconscious mind requires emotions in order to manifest our outcomes. 

 

Generalizations they and them – Who specifically?  He, Him and Her – who specifically.  It – what specifically.  The – what specifically and who specifically.  That and those – what specifically.

 

Examples of things through the language of generalization: They’ve always been like that.  In the past my mother and father have been abrupt.  It will get the results I desire.  My nutritional program will achieve the results I desire.  I have respect for them.  I have respect for my mother and my father.  Some day I will forgive him.  I forgive Jason.  I absolutely believe in you.  I continue to believe in you.  Some day I will really use it.  I am changing my language. 

 

Language of negation.  Our subconscious mind takes our language literally and personally.  When we use a language of negation we are speaking to what is not rather than to what is.  I will explain.  Whenever you begin a sentence with, I’m not, or it’s not or a negation like that, there is a huge red flag moving into your story.  As soon as you begin to start speaking a negation you’re going into your story.  So use that as a red flag for yourself.  When I start speaking in negations I’m going to start talking about my story.  I’m going to take this god-given power of mine, which is my ability to create my reality as I think it, feel it and language it and I’m going to take this preciousness that I have and I’m going to speak about the story.  And then I’m going to make more up about the story. And I’m going to live more out of my story.  And you know what.  You’re going to get the evidence that your story is true.  And that’s what happens.  Over and over again.  Until we wake up to the very system that we’ve been using, that we’ve already mastered, you’ve already done it.  You’re doing it right now.  Everything I’m speaking about you already know.  The only difference is your mind has been focused on the story.  And your language, which represents your thinking, which is a symbol of your thinking, has languaged it and continues to language it as if the story were still true.

 

I was on the radio Wednesday morning on KFNB and got lots of phone calls to the office and this woman called.  She was very, very sick.  Bedridden with MS and in excruciating pain.  I called her and I said, ‘I notice you called the office and you were inquiring about tapes.’  I sent her out the Life Purpose tape and the Master Your Destiny as a gift so she could just listen to those.  Before we hung up she spent at least 20 minutes on her story, telling me why she could not get well because if she got well it means her husband would win because he walked out on her and they’re in this horrible divorce.  She said, ‘I don’t get enough to eat.’  I said, ‘Here’s the phone number for Meals for Wheels.  Here’s the phone number for Mama’s Kitchen.  They’ll provide free food if you’re bedridden.’  And she said, ‘Oh, I can’t do that.  Because if the lawyers find out, they’ll think that I’m more able and then I won’t get the settlement that I desire.’  I’m getting those tapes to her!  And my highest choice is that she really understands how she is keeping her disease in place by the secondary gain of it all.

Please join me tomorrow for a continuation of this.

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So if you give it a different meaning it creates a whole different response in you and we have the control or the choice of the meaning we’re going to give something.  And therefore nothing out there is doing it to us.  We’re doing it and what do we choose to do differently.  It was a very interesting exercise.

 

9.  Our subconscious mind takes everything personally.

 

10.  Our subconscious mind is power without direction.  Our conscious mind gives it direction.

 

11.  Our subconscious mind is always alert and functioning.

 

12.  Our subconscious mind receives direction from our conscious mind.  So whatever we are thinking and speaking happens. 

 

If someone is intending to do you harm and you have the same experience that they’re intending to do you harm, what can you do with that?  That brings me to what happened yesterday to me.  I had the direct experience of someone intending to put up as much resistence to a proposal that I was proposing as possible and I knew it and I knew it was personal and I knew it was also professional jealousy or fear.  I had the real opportunity of creating a higher outcome for the proposal so that everyone won and stepping out of the history of the relationship.  I had that interpretation but my choice was to create a healing and to get into compassion for the lack and the scarcity that was driving that particular behavior.  So when I can get into compassion for that, which I have experienced, then I can understand it and I can work with it more completely and more honorably within myself.  Because if I attack the lack and the scarcity, all I do is make it get bigger.  If I’m choosing to create movement and demonstrate what I teach then it is a requirement for me to do something different with that interpretation – out of the choice of who I’m becoming rather than who I’ve always been.

 

Presuppositions of the nature of language.

 

1.  Language shapes our reality and is literally accepted by our subconscious mind.

 

2.  Language represents thought, thought represents how we filter and perceive reality. 

 

3.  Changing our language changes out thinking which changes our reality.

 

4.  The object on which you are dwelling, be it negative or positive, is the temple at which you pray.  Either the god of your negative thought forms or the god of your positive thought forms will answer.  You become what you dwell on.

 

A tribe in the Philippines have no word for war.  They have never been at war.  Back in the 20s and 30s when the great depression hit, the common metaphor for how the United States described itself on radio and in print was, ‘The country is crippled.’  Within three years – the first outbreak of polio.

 

Language and collective agreement creates huge shifts.  From our emotional states we behave.  >From our behavior the outside world responds to us.  By the response we receive our identities are built.  And the emotional states are created by the words we choose to use.

 

Why change your language?  Changing your language changes your thinking, changes your reality.  To create sustainable personal change it is important to utilize the tools that will re-language our world.  The following are examples of language currently used in everyday conversational English that we can transform.  In order to engage the other 90% of our brain we are required to direct our thinking and become alert to our personal use of language.  Once we do this we program our subconscious mind towards our outcome and our heart’s desire. 

 

I started this whole language course because I was teaching this really powerful Tools For Life training which is a three month intensive course.  That was the first training I ever did.  First month was about cleaning up your relationship with mom and dad.  Second month was about defining life’s purpose and third month was about programming the subconscious mind for outcome.  I thought I had the training that was going to change the planet.  What began to happen was, after about 4 or 5 of those trainings, the students that I saw make the life-changing shifts and I thought they were done.  They’re baked, they’re cooked, they’re done!  They would show up in my office about nine months later with the same emotional behavioral loops that they had before they entered the training.  What happened?  I saw them change.  I stopped everything.  I stopped all the training, my income plummeted.  I could no longer congruently get up in front of a group of people and say, ‘This will change your life.’  I stopped everything, went into this mild form of depression, observable.

 

Why is it that people revert back?  What I came to was the study of language.  And what I realized is that now I can congruently get up in front of a group of people and say, ‘This information will change your life when you use it.  Guaranteed, if you use it.  It will metamorphose how you’ve been living up to this point in time and will shift your life.  Now I can say that because it does.

 

This is the NLP model of communication.  Filters delete, distort and generalize our experiences.  Our filters store and suppress also but the main items are delete, distort and generalize.  We have a vent coming into the neurological sensors.  We have 2000 chunks per second coming in through our sight, sense of touch, smell, hearing and taste.  If we didn’t have these filters we’d all be rolling around foaming at the mouth right now because we’d be unable to withstand the amount of stimulus response that we would be aware of.  So our filters protect us.  What happens then is our filters consist of our language, memories, values, beliefs, attitudes, race, cultural, ancestral influence.  They delete the information, chunk it down to 7 pieces plus or minus 2.  Then we make an internal representation, a picture, of it, we create an emotional state, it gets reflected in our physiology and then we do the behavior.  The filters actually are the key points to what is going to be emphasized for the rest of the weekend.  Because when you know that you yourself have unique memories and unique values based upon what you have made up about your past, no one is going to experience the same experience in the exact same way.  We will have a different slant on it.  We will perceive it a little differently.  If I had someone run through here, dance around for a while and then leave, you would all make up something slightly different about it based upon your own individual filters.

See you tomorrow for more!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gary De Rodriguez

 

 

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Our subconscious mind takes our language literally and personally.  Because we have been speaking in forms of language that we hear around us daily, we are often unaware of what we are actually programming into our subconscious mind.  Our goal is to use language that is outcome oriented first person accountable, and moving in the direction of our goals and objectives. 

The following is a list of commonly used words, which disempower and some language upgrade alternatives to begin to shift our thinking.

 

 

Disempowerment                                          Language Upgrade

 

1. I want                                                          My choice is, I require

 

2. I need                                                          I desire

 

3. I’m not                                                        I am

 

4. I would but                                                  I am

 

5. I must, I have to                                          I choose to

 

6. I can’t                                                          I am

 

7. I’ll try                                                           I am

 

8. I hope                                                            My choice is

 

9. I don’t know                                                 I’ll find out, I choose to know

                                                                          That’s a good question

 

10. You make me                                              I create for myself

 

11. Its hard                                                         It’s a opportunity

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gary De Rodriguez

 

 

 

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One of the key beliefs of Humanistic Neuro Linguistic Psychology is the person who has the most flexibility becomes the most contributing and free person with the systems in which they belong.

 We all belong to a family system that comprises a variety of different relationships, each with their unique perspectives, problems, strengths and weaknesses.  Each one of us has developed complex-beliefs, values and strategies to adapt to the appearance of the loss of love.

 As we mature, we begin to realize that the foundation of our subconscious patterning may not serve our mastering of achieving peace and success.  Instead, it becomes the search for answers, mentors and information to help lead us through the forest of our perceptions and into the clearing of our options and choices.  Here are some perspectives to help us get to the clearing sooner, rather than later.

 A mighty law of life is the requirement to become masterful in our relationships.  This is where the rubber hits the road between what we have studied, and hold as beliefs and truisms, and what has actually been integrated inside us as our identity.

 When we are able to demonstrate congruency between what we believe and what our actions actually are, we strengthen our identity and raise our self esteem.  This, also, allows us to resonate out into the complex, unseen universe of causation a field of “I am worthy.” This field permits us to draw, like a magnet, the opportunities that support our every dream.

 The art of causation is based upon various laws, other than the law of attraction, and must be honored to obtain consistent results and a sense of mastery over the unpredictability of life.

 Here is a key principle:  Only commit to what you know you can keep your word to; and keep your word no matter what!

 As you strengthen your worthiness through the laboratory of your relationships, hold to this one rule so you can increase your compassion for others and develop the muscle of your growing flexibility and congruency.

 Realize that each person behaves out of a different set of beliefs, memories, values and collection of experiences that act as their map of reality.  Another’s reality will be forever different than our own.  We have to master the art of flexibility to our perception and find curiosity in what happened during another’s experience to cause the molding of their beliefs.  Once we master this art, we can honor the other person’s perspective and offer more genuine conversations and relationships.

 The success driven individual realizes that to create the success they deserve, one must honor another’s perspective and have the courage to hold authentic conversations filled with artful questions that are filled with respect.

 Conversations filled with the positioning of who is right and who is wrong, or armoring for the next attack, will always lead to destroyed relationships, stress and fractured families, organizations and teams.

 Each of our realities are just as valid as any other person’s, so we should enter our dialogues with the primary intent to clarify, understand, enrich and empower our relationships with appropriate boundaries for ourselves.

 Here are some strategies for holding conversations that work, build relationships, congruency and respect while avoiding the pitfalls that are common when two people are seeing through different colored lenses.

 Be mindful of the following:

 When you enter into a difficult conversation, begin the dialogue with an established outcome for the discussion.

 Questions to ask:

 What is your outcome for our conversation?

 What do you need to feel like we both are honored?

 What would be your highest choice for this situation?

 Foundational Principles:

 Be in physiological rapport with the other person.

 Enter the conversation with the intention to clarify, enrich and empower.

 Be accountable for your part of the situation.

 Know that you are creating your own emotional responses and that you do have a choice.

 Be fully and completely present with the other person.

 Here are some great questions to begin the conversation:

 What choices can we co-create?

1. What is our outcome for this conversation?  What do we desire to have an awareness of, breakthrough in or resolution with?
2. What do you require to know from me to give you clarity?
3. What do you and I need to do to create a resolution?
4. What information from me do you need to feel safe?

 Many times in relationships, we hold in silence those conversations that seem too difficult to have.  This act of silence results in the growing resentment toward the other person for our own lack of courage to be authentic.  We will, generally, blame the other person for how bad we feel and our emotional contraction will lessen our sense of self respect and self worth.

 This is how relationships fail both personally and professionally.  The heart of the relationship is the conversation.  The success of that conversation is based upon our courage to step up with our intention to empower and clarify.  When we engage in our relationships from this foundation, we strengthen our self worth and empower ourselves to attract the opportunities that we deserve.

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