Events In Time

Events are empty unto themselves and our perspectives ascribe the meaning to them which will either transform them into personal and professional benefits or perpetuate our distortion.  Our distortions are generated from the collective experience of our past, therefore the First LAW for a Fulfilling Life is: Transform your past to be Your Greatest Ally for Your Future.

 For any of us to be successful, personally and professionally, we require powerful and trusting alliances within our relationships.  The primary hierarchy of importance in our relationships is first, relationship to oneself.  The second is relationship to others, and the third is relationship to a deeper purpose for which your life contributes back.   Relationships with others are based upon our ability to effectively communicate and our communication is based upon the level of rapport and trust we are capable of establishing.

 One extraordinarily important principle for organizations and families to recognize is each member of the organization affects others and will enhance or contaminate the culture.   According to the Heart Math Research Institute, each individual emanates a resonate field of energy measurable by science that affects other people around them.  This resonate field is created by the overall emotional states the person feels continually.

 The health of your family or your company is based upon the collective thinking patterns of the members within it.  Each person affects the whole of the environment in which they dwell, whether it is home or office, with their thoughts, the language that represents those thoughts and the emotions they produce as a consequence.  Does it make sense that fundamental Life skills to transform thinking and emotions are required for our personal, spiritual and financial success?

 I was conducting a series of trainings for a prominent pharmaceutical company in California in their global safety department, which consisted of approximately twenty highly skilled doctors and research scientists.

The VP of the department had contacted me and communicated that the culture within the department was sliding downhill fast.  The staff was under tremendous pressure with long work hours and impossible deadlines.  The extra stress of personality conflicts was the straw that would break the camel’s back. His primary concern was that he would begin losing his highly qualified staff he had worked so hard to recruit.

   I arrived on the grounds of the company which was like a mini city in its entirety.  With walking paths, child care, a gymnasium, a pool and overlooking the Pacific Ocean:  A rather stunning place to work.

 As I enter the training room and met the team I noticed one individual in the room who seemed defensive and withdrawn before I even opened my mouth.  The team was cordial, alert, but reserved.  As I began the presentation this one individual would barely participate, distracted others and was in overall resistance to learning the communication tools I was presenting. 

 Rather than leave a contaminating personality in the room with the other willing participants, I firmly, and respectfully, asked him to leave the training room.  With every organization I have the privilege of working with, I reserve this right.

 As soon as this doctor left the training room the entire room took a collective breath simultaneously.  The energy of the room relaxed and I observed the tension leaving the bodies of the members of the team.  I stood there wondering could this one individual have this much influence on the stress levels and the growing negative culture of the department.

 I merely had to ask one simple question: “How are you all feeling now?”

Like a monsoon of information, each person shared their frustration with this individual.  He was recently recruited and was one of the medical heads of the department which required much of the work to be approved by.  Story after story came forward about how difficult it was to accomplish the workload after his arrival and how the management could not see it.

 Resentment had built toward the VP, communication lessened because of resentment and the VP did not have enough information to take action. 

The remainder of the trainings went effectively and the culture shifted dramatically after the enactment of the communication tools which were taken onboard by the team.  The resistant doctor entered a coaching program with me, through the request of the VP.  The core experiences which drove his behavior were uncovered and resolved, resulting in him becoming a functional part of the team.  

 My belief is that people affect other people and each one of us has the responsibility to become fully matured in our relationship to ourselves.  By taking responsibility for our own emotional states, getting clarity, having effective conversational and negotiation skills while ceasing the destructive positioning for power and the need to be right, we can reach that mature state in our relationship to ourselves.  Each one of us requires to become fully self aware and have the tools to shift our beliefs, transform our past experiences to retain the wisdom rather than the resentment.  Each one of us requires to become fully responsible for the filters we see our world through, so that we can become as free as we can from over reacting emotions and distortions.

 We require to learn the art of entering into our communication with a genuine desire to enrich our business and personal relationships with authentic conversations and accountability for our emotional states.  When we exhibit flexibility in our approach to others, we view the diversity of other peoples’ perspectives, with understanding and grace, while creating peace within ourselves.

 Here are some foundational principles:

 Principles:

1. Be in physiological rapport with the other person so you have the ability to create an unconscious connection during the conversation.

2. Enter the conversation with the intention to clarify, enrich and empower yourself, and the other person equally.

3. Authentically desire that a win-win occur from the conversation.

4. Be accountable for your part in creating any disagreements in the situation

5. Be fully focused and completely present with the other person.

6. Know that you are creating your own emotional responses and that you have a choice.

 Before you enter a conversation that is important to you, clarify your outcomes with the following questions when you enter the conversation:

 Setting Outcomes:

1. What do you desire?

2. If we both got what we desired what would that look like?

3. What would be your highest choice for the situation?

4. What would it take to make us both feel great?

5. What do you require to feel like we both won?

6. What is your outcome for our conversation?

 Our relationships are the temple we reveal our emotional intelligence and our relationship with ourselves.  The more we can enter our conversations with awareness the greater our relationships will blossom, the more effective we will become and the higher our self esteem and self worth will rise. 

Love & Light

Gary De Rodriguez

Are You Awake?

Are you awake to what is possible?

The world is calling out for humanity to awaken to the great gifts it has been given, to awaken to the knowledge of the divine order inherent in our family systems. If we would take the time to understand them, the triumphs and tragedies of our ancestors are incredibly revealing. They reveal our soul purpose and help us to know we are made in the image and likeness of the Divine. By nurturing, studying and recreating our internal circumstances-our inner emotional world-we can empower ourselves to positively and permanently impact what is happening around us.

 Let this be the moment in history that you decided to stand up and be the most beautiful human being possible.

• Let this be the moment in history that you let go of that which you were attached to.
• Let this be the moment in history that you halted your obsessions with the mundane and with the things you could not change.
• And finally, let this be the moment in history that you decided to STOP WASTING TIME.

 How can we ever attempt to understand and overcome the conflicts and wars that exist on this planet until we each become accountable for winning the mini wars that exist within our own minds? People that operate from a place of pain, suffering, lack or any other unresolved emotion will not perpetuate success. They cannot create a real, lasting shift in culture or the dynamic between themselves and others.

When we understand the river of time which we are traveling, we will know that all things change constantly, and change is the only consistency we have. It is not the events that occur in time within our lives that cause the pain. It is the meaning we have assigned to those events that creates our Heaven or our Hell. It is the focus of our minds that either releases us or imprisons us. Time is like a river, and events in our lives are like leaves passing by us in the current. Which leaves do we choose to pick up and examine? For how long to we hold each leaf in our grasp? And which ones do we choose to let quietly float by?

What if you spend your time obsessing on the story of how it has been, yet the way it has been contains the exact circumstances that created and evolved you? What if you spend your life blaming, regretting and condemning the people and the secret teachers who have arrived to show you the way? What if it all happened out of a loving intention to evolve your spiritual wisdom and maturity?

Be the Love you are. Remain in the new story of your outcome. Create different internal representations-different pictures, sounds, dialogs and feelings-by imagining vividly enough to where you feel them deeply. Recreate your past with the power to redefine what has occurred, and distill the wisdom from your experiences with a blessing upon your lips for the ancestral teachers you have had and the order and perfection that is moving us all back to a state of Oneness.

If we can begin to re-language and re-imagine our experiences, we will think and feel differently about our lives and the human condition in general. We will remain in a more optimal and consistent emotional state that allows us the freedom to open and direct our imagination and focused mind toward what we truly desire to create in our world. We can then become the men and women we have always known we could be. We can then master the art of living in this world of seeming victimization as people who expect and direct the quantum field of possibility into existence based upon our freedom to cease the endless story of what did and did not happen. We will be free to create our future with compassion and fulfill what our ancestors could not. We will live with a blessing on our lips for all who went before us in our ancient ancestral lineage.

While existing within the density of our bodies in a world full of fear, all our experiences can culminate in the awakening to our divine inheritance.

Love & Light

Look Within

 

 

Creating Abundance Through Conversation

Our success or failure is determined by our ability to maintain and strengthen our relationships. Our ability to hold conversations with the intention of enrichment and understanding is at the heart of our relationship success. And relationship success governs our prosperity and happiness.

A key tenet of Humanistic Neuro Linguistic Psychology (HNLP) is that the person with the most flexibility becomes the most contributing person to the system in which they belong. When we realize that each person functions from a different set of beliefs, memories, values, and experiences (and therefore drawing their map of reality differently than our own), we must honor the fact that people are looking through different lenses and creating different realities.

Conversations filled with positioning of who is right or wrong or with armoring for the next attack, will always lead to destroyed relationships and fractured families, organizations and teams. The success destined individual, however, knows that by mastering flexibility of perception, she can more authentically honor the unique perspectives of those around her. She can comfortably hold authentic conversations filled with skillful and artful questions. This skill is the cornerstone of continued success in life.

Each of our realities is just as valid as any other person’s, so we require to learn and master the art of flexibility. We require to learn how to enter conversations with the primary intent to understand and empower our relationships while maintaining appropriate boundaries for ourselves. When we enter our conversations with this conscious intention, we can master the art of flexibility and increase our ability to hold authentic conversations, boosting our influence and increasing our own self esteem.

For example, what would your reality be like if you made a pact with yourself to simply stop talking ill of anyone? Try it. Find the highest thing you can say about one another and speak to that. Hold your highest thought for one another even if the other person’s behavior is disappointing to you. The results of this simple exercise are remarkable, remarkable both for you personally and for everyone you touch.

Principles of the Win-Win Conversation

Strengthen and leverage your relationships with these strategies for effective communication.

1. Be in physiological rapport with the other person.
2. Enter the conversation with the intention to clarify and enrich.
3. Also enter with the intention to empower yourself and the other person equally.
4. Authentically desire a win-win from the conversation.
5. Be accountable for your part in the situation.
6. Be fully and completely present with the other person.
7. Know that you are creating your own emotional responses and that you have a choice.

Perspective Shifting and Finding the Harmony

Ask yourself these questions to establish the intention and outcome for any conversation and steer yourself away from pitfalls that are most commonly entered when two people are seeing through two different lenses.

1. What am I not seeing?
2. Where is my attention?
3. Where am I not being realistic?
4. What could be the positive intention of the other person?
5. How could I look at this differently?
6. How many different perspectives can I take to give me clarity?
7. What is present when I’m at my best?
8. What part of the solution am I?
9. Where might I be in denial?
10. What am I afraid of here, and is it real?
11. What are my false assumptions?
12. Who am I when I speak and act from my heart?
13. What changes will I affect when I show up as who I really am?
14. What is it to be a leader?
15. What am I grateful for in this situation?
16. What is the one thing that I require to say to bring resolution?
17. What am I teaching myself in this situation?

We require to utilize all of the skills available to us such as strong coaching questions, accountable perception, positive intention, and the ability to create rapport at the subconscious level.

By creating this type of environment of safety and trust, we can sustain our happiness and be a light to those who surround us.

Love & Light

Your Life

Will you pass down chaos or choice?

This life you are leading-a life clothed by your current identity-is an incredible gift. Even if your experience here has been a painful one, realize that it is a spiritual journey, not a stop-off on the way to Heaven or Hell. You absolutely required to be here at this exact moment in history.

As we walk through life in Human Form, we are continuously presented with windows of opportunity to acquire the wisdom of our ancestry. We each have created a soul contract with our mothers and fathers to utilize this earthly existence to deepen our own relationship with the Divine. Your unique family system provides you with a laboratory of joy and pain that can be used to awaken your deepest core wounds so they may be healed and transformed. Through this awakening, you travel a path of finding the answers and creating the healing you require so that you may return back to love.

Our family dynamics were designed and created out of love, no matter how our family systems manifested themselves in this physical reality. We are not victims, and we must know that we can rise above the ancestral dynamic and live life as the designer of own destiny.

The ancestral buck stops with each one of us. We can learn to be co-creators of our reality. We can and should take a stand for creating balance within ourselves, our families, and our communities. We can rise above our ancestral influences and live life from the perspective of choice, not chaos. We can then pass this way of living on to our children, creating a movement of personal accountability from the very young to the aged.

By healing the ancestral patterns, we celebrate the perfection of the order of life. We came through the perfect parents who co-created the perfect circumstances to wound us in the perfect way and create the dynamic tension that would spur each of to begin the quest towards self actualization. The divine order of our family dynamics allows our souls to mature and awakens in us the opportunity to evolve and celebrate. That is the gift.

The Hopis say there is absolutely no past, that everything that ever existed is present right here in the cells of our bodies, that every ancestor that ever lived is resonating in our DNA. You are the culmination of the thought forms of everything that has gone before you. Yet you have the choice to do it differently. You have the choice to overcome the idea of separation and fear. You have the choice to move out of the victim archetype and to be first person accountable for creating your world out of the words you speak, the things you contemplate, and the emotions you choose to feel.

By learning the tools of the science and technology of Humanistic Neuro Linguistic Psychology, we can still the stories of our past and awaken the inherent wisdom that is within each of us. The baton is in your hands. The technology is available. It is time to transform our ancestral patterns and awaken to what we came here to be: accountable, empowered, contributive, loving and compassionate to all living things.

Love & Light

PEACE

If you have a flat tire on the side of the road, are you going to sit there and pray God will come along and actually fix your tire for you? Or are you going to use your legs, walk to the gas station, and get your tire fixed, knowing that God gave you the legs to do so?

Whatever you believe the power we call “God” to be, that power gave you imagination, language and the ability to evoke emotions, the key elements to conscious creating. For you are designed in such a way that every cell of your body hears every word you speak.

What if God looked down and said, “YES! Whatever you are dwelling on, whatever you are contemplating, I have no judgment! There is no death, and there is no good or bad. I am just one big ‘Yes!’ Whatever you ask for, the answer is ‘Yes.’ Disease and pestilence. Yes! Wealth and abundance. Yes!”

How weird, right? Or is it?

It’s all a belief anyway, so how do you know for sure? And IF the power we call God is like this-if God is this pragmatic-would it be useful to learn how to direct the mind?

As you observed in my story about the boy with cancer, language and collective agreement create huge shifts. From your emotional states you create an internal reality that affects your body as well as others around you. The question is, how will you manage this dynamic? Will you habitually harness the power of your word, therefore creating better choices around emotionally driven behaviors? Or will you follow the path of least resistance and continue with unbridled language and emotions?

When we think about our language, we require to be aware that our language is a symbol of the way we think. As if in a picture window, every word you speak, every non-verbal cue you give-no matter how subtle-is on display for the world to see. And what you say to others, verbally and non-verbally, deeply affects them. Remember, we live in a human ecology where each individual greatly impacts the world as a whole.

The presuppositions inherent in our language promote self awareness, keeping us focused upon the eternal now. Focused language creates huge impacts, not only on your immediate circle of influence, but on the world at large. It is a creative force in the most literal sense. Take comfort in the knowledge that you walk in this life with a purpose greater than what you may immediately observe.

Disciplining your use of language is akin to practicing urban Shamanism because it takes a great deal of focus to shift and transform it. I invite you to eliminate the practice of speaking to what has happened-to your “story”-and instead speak only to your eternal now. I also invite you to stop speaking of your fears about the future, and begin speaking in detail about the steps you are taking to manifest your desired outcomes.

In summary, conscious creation through the presupposition of language unfolds like this:

 You create small action steps that you can perform on a daily basis.

1. You begin to language your world according to your outcomes, exclusing fear based thoughts and communications.
2. In turn, you acquire greater control of your emotional states.
3. From these more stable emotional states, you acquire the motivation necessary to complete each step to manifest your outcomes.
4. As you begin actually manifesting your outcomes, your self worth increases.
5. As your self worth and influence increases, you begin to attract greater opportunities to yourself.

 It all begins with the discipline to harness the power of your word. By using language that is outcome oriented, you will find that you need to speak less often and with less urgency. When you do speak, it will be powerful; people will listen; and you will become a conscious creator.

Love & Light